What Lies Within Us
by The Hand Of Fate
Summary: "What lies behind us and what lies before us, are small matters when compared to what lies within us." The Memories are returning. It's almost time, but I still have something to do here, no matter how many times, how many worlds, how many cycles, I will find redemption. I have to believe I have changed. Because I need to see her again... (One Shot) (AU) Please review


Gunshots and screams are the first thing I hear. I look around and see mud, bits of rock, trenches, and improvised cover. What...a familiar site. I start walking forward and prepare myself for what I'm about to do, today is my last day in this world, and I'm going to spend it killing monsters. After about two minutes I come across the first body, his back is propped against a piece of makeshift cover, his chest is stained with blood, and there is a half empty bottle of whiskey in his hand. He didn't die outright, he bled out. I close his eyes, and after a moment I take his whiskey, he doesn't need it anymore. It's another minute before I come across my first live person. She's a blonde, crouching down, firing into the mist at what I presume is her enemy, she turned to reload and her eyes met mine, they widened in shock.

"What the Hell are you doing here?!" She screamed at me, "This is no place for an innocent civilian!" I couldn't help it, I started laughing, It started small, merely chuckles, then it grew into full blown laughter. Finally I turned to her and said, "I'm not a civilian, and I'm anything but innocent." I saw that she wasn't going to let me move on, so I sighed and slowly I let her see what I was.

She stared at me in shock, she could feel the power rolling off me in waves. Suddenly she fell to her knees in prayer.

"Stand up." I snapped, "I'm not your god, or whomever you think I am."

She stood up her knees were shaking I walked past her, she wasn't important. "W-Wait," she called after me, her voice was shaking with fear. "W-why are y-you here?"

I turned, smiled, and replied, "Because I just remembered who I am, and what I've done, and something needs to die."

* * *

 _Gunshots and screams are the first thing I hear. I'm running, but not fast enough, bullets fly over my head as I dive into the trench with my fellow "soldiers" How did it come to this? I never wanted to fight! I was just so angry, I had lost so much. I wanted...vengeance. But...I never wanted this. I never believed in this cause. I just wanted to kill as many of them as I could for what they did. And the easiest (and legal) way to do this was was to join the war. But I never actually believed in this stupid war. I don't believe in slavery. But that's what I'm fighting for. And now, I'm no better than them. The men men who killed my father. I've done terrible things, I'll never forget the first time I saw the camps in all their "glory" the screams still haunt me. I still have the scars from when my superior caught me giving food to some of the slaves. What have I done? What have I done to myself? What have I done...to her? I left her all alone, and I don't know if I'll ever come back... I'm sorry. I inhale, tighten the grip on my gun, and move forward, and I remember. I remember why I'm here and what has been done to me, and why they all need to die._

* * *

I walk forward past the trenches and the cover, some of the soldiers look at me, but they make no move to stop me. They have no idea who I am or what I can do, but they can feel my power. I take the final step, and there they are. The monsters, the monsters in human skin. When I went to the future of this universe I found information about this scum that dare call themselves human beings. Fascists, racisim, sexisim, and slavery camps that make Auschwitz look like Disneyland, and makes The Anti-World look like Auschwitz. They have enslaved and murdered millions. They all deserve to die. My hand closes around the hilt of a Katana with no visible blade. This is Mors Innocentiae, "The Death Of Innocence." It is my Anima Gladio, my "Soul Blade" my key to The Gates Of The Multiverse. Everything I am, everything I have been, and everything I will be is represented by this sword. My thumb finds the hidden switch on the hilt, a switch that only I, or some close enough to me to know my soul, can find. I hear the familiar _snap-hiss,_ as a black blade made forms from black smoke, hardens into a black metal and hums faintly, the soldiers that I have come here to kill stare at me in shock, awe, and fear. One of them, braver than the others, fires on me, I watch with satisfaction as his face changes from concentration, to shock, then fear as I casually slice his bullet in half.

"What the F-" is all he manages to say before my blade stabs into his chest and carves out through his side. The smell of burning flesh enters my nose as Mors Innocentiae cauterizes the wound. I look up, and I'm surrounded by the men I'm here to exterminate, and I smile, It had been a long time since I was the one killing monsters, and not a monster myself.

* * *

 _I walk forward past the trenches and the cover, some of the soldiers look at me, but they make no move to stop me. They have their own problems to deal with, I fire on some the enemies that I can make out in the mist, then I freeze. Looking back on it, that was the moment I realized I was going to die here. Fighting for a cause that I despise. A wave of power rushed over me, over all of us making me freeze in place. Pure terror rushed over me as I watched_ _ **Him**_ _walk out of the mist. A black cloak draped over his shoulders, a flash of blonde hair, and the hilt of a sword clasped in his hand. Under any other circumstance I would have laughed, but we could all feel it rolling off him in waves, power, rage, and death. Then there was a sound, a sound that was unlike anything I had heard before in my life, it was a_ _ **snap-hiss**_ _as a pure black blade emerged from the hilt he had clasped in his hand. It hummed with power and blurred slightly when it moved. One of my fellow soldiers, raised his rifle and fired on the...being. All of us felt despair and shock when he merely sliced the bullet in half. Shock because what he had done was impossible, and despair because we knew in that moment, that he was going to kill all of us. My comrade who had fired his gun barely had time to exclaim his shock before the blade had plunged his chest and then carved out through his side. As his body hit the ground, all was still, then the man moved. He was a blur his blade carved through anyone who stood in his path. Limbs, and bits of charred flesh littered the ground, and very few had the chance to scream before they were silenced forever. I merely stood there shaking in fear, one thought racing through my head; "What do I do?"_

* * *

My blade carved their bodies with ease, I felt like laughing, I was doing something that I was supposed to do, I was interfering in a world that I was aloud to interfere in, and I was making it better. The memories are rushing back and now, I can remember who I am. I am Jaune Arc of Universe 1218, and I am a Keeper Of The Gateways Of The Multiverse. After I lost everything I cared for on my world, I lost myself. I lost my hope, my drive, and my restraint. I did something that I never should have done to gain the power I needed to destroy the one who took everything from me, and all it cost me was my soul, and my sanity. Corrupted by the power I wasn't ready to wield, I forsook my order and forgot our most precious edict; We are NOT gods. I wiped out entire universes, murdered an unfathomable number of beings, and I almost killed a woman I have grown to love. Eventually I was stopped by my Beloved, who restored my sanity, and left my fellow Keepers to decide my fate. It was decided that my memory would be wiped, leaving me with only my name. Then I would be cast into a random universe, trapped there until I could remember who I was. Then a portal would open, I would walk through it, my memory would be wiped and I would be thrown into another universe. This cycle was to repeat until my Nineteenth birthday, where I would face my final trial and be welcomed back into the Keepers, an outcast no more. I deserved so much worse, but it is a harsh punishment. For every 20 millenium, a Keeper ages by one day. One. Day. The number of my age is a number than you could not begin to comprehend. It is a fitting punishment for one who destroyed a mainstream universe. One of the only places where we, above all, cannot interfere. But now is not the time to grieve, the portal Is close to opening, I know because I can remember her name now, the last thing I remember is always her face, she is always the last thing I see before my memories are torn from my head, and that is either the most merciful thing I can imagine, or the most brutal form of torture. Mors Innocentiae carves another soldier in half then moves up into another's throat, as always, there is no resistance, my blade carves through them like they are made of butter, it tears them apart, without leaving any blood, as any wound I inflict on them is instantly cauterized. Then something entirely unexpected happens, a lone soldier stands before me, a cutlass clasped in hand, he is shaking in fear, but there is resolve in his eyes. His resolve is surprising...why? Ah. He didn't come here to fight, he came here to die. To buy time for his "Friends" to escape, to protect his fellow slavers and murders. Well, If he wants to die, I am more than happy to oblige him.

* * *

 _I stare in shock as a lone man slaughters more than 50 men in a minute. He carves through them like they aren't even there, when they fire on him, he merely slices the bullets apart, when they charge him, he cuts them down, when they try to run, the blade stabs into them before they can take two steps. He kills all of them. He wades through them like they're standing still. The shere rate at which our numbers drop is insane, how is he doing this?! What is he?! Is he some kind of devil, sent to punish us for all that we've done?! I immediately dive behind some cover and try to think, there isn't anything I can do! What can I- my eyes fall on the dead body of an officer, his head has been removed from his shoulders, and their is a sword clasped in his hand, and at that moment I made a choice. I grabbed the cutlass, and stepped out to face my death. He stares at me inquisitively as if wondering what I'm doing, then his face shifts to realization, then...what? Understanding? Pity? Empathy? Before it falls into a neutral position. And suddenly, he's on top of me, I barely bring the cutlass up in time to block his strike, he seemed surprised, then his face once more becomes unreadable. At that moment, I understood, I truly understood, he didn't see me as a threat, he didn't even see me at all. And it wasn't because he believed he was superior to me. But he was superior, I could feel the power radiating off him in waves, I was nothing to this man, He was a Dragon, and I...was less than an ant. He had fought men like me before, he'd killed men like me before. He had killed a thousand me's, and I...I was just an insignificant red X on a list that was longer than I could comprehend._

* * *

This one is… interesting. I'm surprised that he was able to counter my first blow, and he is able to continue fighting, and even put me on the defensive once or twice. It's impressive, not many men can say they have fought a Keeper for more than 2 seconds. But it won't last, he will fall like all those before him, he knows this, yet he is still fighting me, admirable. He and I are rather alike.

* * *

 _I'm nothing like this man, and can see the amusement in his eyes, he's toying with me._

* * *

Impressive, he has actually made me use actual combat moves, instead of just toying with him.

* * *

 _As my death draws closer, I find myself thinking of her, tears in her eyes, begging me not to leave, telling me this isn't what he wanted._

* * *

As the memories rush back, I find myself thinking of her, tears in her eyes, begging me not to do this, telling me that this isn't what I want.

* * *

 _Telling me that I'm not a killer._

* * *

Telling me that I don't have to be a monster.

* * *

 _Staring at me with sorrow and pride telling me that she loves me._

* * *

Staring at me with shock and despair, telling me I'm not the person she fell in love with.

* * *

 _Hugging me on the platform, saying I can still turn back. Not believing her own words._

* * *

Restraining me, screaming that It's not too late to turn back. Not believing her own words.

* * *

 _I will always love that woman._

* * *

I will always regret what could have been.

* * *

 _We decided to postpone the wedding until after I got back._

* * *

She made me promise to marry her when my exile ended.

* * *

 _But looking back I knew, staring at her through the window of the train, waving at me, trying to hide the tears in her eyes…_

* * *

But looking back, I knew, staring at her, her hand pressed against the glass, not bothering to hide the tears in her eyes as I prepared to enter a room that would rob me of who I am…

* * *

 _I would never see her again…_

* * *

I would never be who I once could have been…

* * *

I finally manage to slice the cutlass out of his hand before driving my sword into his throat. He's a monster, he deserves to die like this.

* * *

 _My throat feels like fire as I choke on my own charred flesh, no one deserves to die like this…_

* * *

The final piece of my memory clicks into place, and I can finally picture what she looks like, her beautiful red hair, her emerald green eyes, and a smile that knew I would always be hers, even when I was lost. So this is how this life ends, with me taking another's…Pyrrha...

* * *

 _I can see her, her beautiful red hair, her emerald green eyes, and a smile that knew I would always love her for her and nothing else. So this Is how my life ends...Pyrrha…_

* * *

" _ **I'm Sorry."**_

* * *

As the final bit of life leaves his body I finally get a good look at the man I'm fighting, and see...my own face staring back at me. There is nothing like seeing your own dead face stare at you. This wasn't the first time I've seen another version of myself die, and...I doubt it will be the last. ...What have I done? I was wrong. I shouldn't have gotten involved. I haven't changed at all, I'm still the same monster forcing myself into matters that don't concern me, I should...have learned more, I only looked at the victors account, I should learned more about the soldiers, instead of what they were fighting for, I should have…I should have done so many things differently. My musing are interrupted as the portal opens in front of me. Time to leave, time repeat this cycle. This time, I deserve it more than usual. I stare at the swirling vortex in front of me, and come to the realization that I don't want to leave, I...want to remember her. Why can't I just have that!? Why did I do it!? WHY?! I fall to my knees and ram my fists into the ground, I tear apart the earth around me, ripping boulders out the ground with my bare hands. I destroy the world, and restore it in less then a second. I roar into the heavens, I curse my power, I curse The Keepers, and I curse myself. Then I stop. Tears flow from my eyes, and one last scream of despair escapes my lips. Within the scream is my rage, my regret, and all of my sorrow. Then I weep, I weep for myself, the 15-year old boy who had to live knowing that one day he would become me. I weep for my teachers, who spent centuries training me and Pyrrha to be Keepers, I weep for my Mother, who I hadn't seen what for me was lifetimes, but for her would only be weeks. But most of all I weep for Pyrrha, the Woman I love more than anything, and for the child that, because of what I'd done, we could never have. Then I'm flying through the void. Memories are being torn from my head, I no longer know my Mother's birthday, or the name of my youngest sister, nor the day My father had left to buy a new car, only to be struck by one. She's beginning to fade from me as well. NO! Please! Just let me keep her! PLEASE! I need-...her? Who? Who is she? Why can't I remember….

* * *

When I open my eyes I'm lying in a forest, everything hurts and I can barely move. When I can finally stand up I ask,

"Where am I?..." But before I can even try to find an answer to that a far more important question comes to mind.

"Who-who am I?"

"Who Am I?!"

"WHO AM I?!"

* * *

 **Please review, I'm thinking about making a series about what was described in the memories, please give me you opinions.**


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